Kiwis and Fairy Bread

24 December 2023

It has been a hot and sunny day here in Akaroa. The town was bustling with shoppers. The butcher and the baker were running out of stock. The cranky owner of the Fish and Chip Shop begrudgingly told me they would be closing at 3pm and if I showed up at 3:30 I wouldn’t get anything. (“I wouldn’t dream of it” I replied as I made a hasty retreat). Jean, employee at The Crater Coffee Cafe, lost her lucky American dollar bill, which we had found, and happily returned to her. And word was spreading around town that Ada had caught a fish! A joyous event at the end of the pier that we happen to witness. It was indeed a big fish caught by quite a small girl. Her dad and big brothers couldn’t have been prouder.

It was all shaping up to be a very Merry Christmas. At 7pm the sun was still high in sky. But when I heard jingle bells and caught site of The Claus Family (“Kris, Jessica” and their two little elves) making the rounds to all the camper vans and tents, offering us each good cheer and chocolates, I lost it. The tears started to flow. I miss you all very much.

It is wonderful to be in this beautiful place. With Mike, the most loving of husbands beside me every minute. But it just doesn’t feel like Christmas (Ben, I know exactly what is going through your head as you read this. And although there is no dog named Goliath to comfort me, there are plenty of mallard ducks. I’m laughing at your thoughts).

I admit that I am missing the full morning of baking, and then dropping cookies to Sue and the 4H Community Holiday Dinner. I miss the last minute wrapping of the gifts while watching my favorite Christmas movies. I miss welcoming Emi and David home, and Ben’s excitement. I miss the tree and all my decorations. I miss our neighborhood and the good wishes we share with each other throughout the day. I miss being useful, especially at church. I will miss the reading aloud of the story.

I miss the cold and the dark. I miss the lights.

It is 9pm right now and still the sun has not set.

When it does finally get dark, I will miss singing Silent Night by candle light.

All of these things will come again next year, I know. And in a few weeks, we will of course have our Christmas celebration with our dear Ben, Emily and David. And then with my siblings, Carol and Chip and my beloved parents. And I will look back on this day and smile.

On Christmas Eve, there is always moment when I sit alone, in the dark , teary eyed and count my blessings. Which have always been many. So maybe tonight is not so different.

……20 minutes later…..

The sky lit up in rays of pink and blue. New friends came out to share the site. The sound of Christmas bells wafted up from the town. Nope, I was wrong. Not church bells, but vintage pop music from a bar: Stepping Out by Joe Jackson. I laughed out loud. A family across the way has just invited us to share Christmas dinner with them tomorrow. The town below is twinkling.

To all of you who are reading this, thanks for sharing the emotional roller coaster that has been my Christmas Eve.

I’ve got to say it. You know I do. God Bless us. Every one.